Funny Bank Moment #6: Friendly Greetings
I called up a client to follow up an investment product for booking, “Good morning! Can I talk to Ms. Herminia Villanueva?”
“Wala sya,” said the woman on the other line, “sino ‘to?” she immediately asked.
I then introduced myself and asked if I could call Ms. Herminia on her celfone.
“Di ko alam ang number nya,” heartlessly said by the woman.
Good thing I know the client’s number so I told her, “Ah, ok, ma’am, alam ko naman po ang celfone nya,” I said cheerfully.
She then replied, “Bahala ka.”
Wew! Shungit.
I thanked her and called the client on her celfone.
Forefathers
Sam’s teacher asked them, “Ano ang ibig sabihin ng KKK?” Ofcourse we all have been through this. Mr. A the big K but how are kids these days? Do they still know this?
A classmate answered, “Mam, Kasal? Kasali? Kasalo?”
What is happening to the world?
Born Again
“Tito,” Sam, my Grade 3 niece called me, I knew something was up, “ano ibig sabihin ng Born Again?”
Then after I explained to her the meaning of the other Christian sect, she concluded, “Oh… ibig sabihin pinanganak sila ulit?”
I simply answered, “Yes.”
“Namatay na ang mga classmate ko?!”
Picture Guide #1
It’s funny how the spelling makes or breaks the selling point:
“Ano gamit mong sabon?”
“Buddy Guard!”
“Wow!”
“Ikaw?”
“Lidi Guard.”
Cozy Rainy Mornings
It’s everybody’s story.
Rainy season. Dark skies. Misty mornings. Can’t get out of bed. Then you realized, “Hey! I’m late for work!”
I hurriedly showered, ate breakfast and made myself up. I quickly went downstairs and put on my left leather shoe and then my right shoe. I felt something soft inside my shoe. It was soft and kinda wet. I picked it up thinking my nieces must’ve jokingly stuck clay in my shoe. I looked in and surprised to see a frog staring back at me. Nyaha! I threw off the shoe and changed my socks. I asked ate Mila (our house help) to throw the frog and clean the shoe.
I told the story to one of my friends and they suggested I should’ve kissed the frog. It might’ve been my princess charming. Eeeewwww!
It is everybody’s story.
Something New
“Agnes, look at me.” I told my choirmate.
“Ano ang bago sa akin?” I asked Agnes. She then stared the whole of my face and my whole body.
‘Nagpagupit ba sya? New T-shirt? Bagong Shoes? Hindi naman.’ Agnes thought.
“Ano na?!” I followed up.
“Wala naming bago sayo eh.”
“Hello? Napunit kaya ang kanang contact lense ko. Di mo kita? Bago ang kanan kong contact lense oh. Bulag ka ba?” I answered angrily.
“Lintek ka ewan ko sayo!”
A Change is Coming
After I stepped off from the driver’s seat in the jeep, I felt something different. My world is not the same. This was back when I was 13 years old, I was going home from school. There is a sudden change in the balance around. It’s like something is boiling up, a change is coming…
I walked a few steps and the driver was shouting, “Boy!”
I looked back. I wondered if the driver have a fifth sense. Can they feel empathy? Do they know what’s running on their passengers mind? Can he also feel the change that I felt?
“May naiwan ka!” then threw a black piece of rubber. It landed just before me and as I stared down, my face reddened. All the people who saw had a wide grin on their faces. Suwelas pala ng sapatos ko! Kaya pala di balance ang tayo ko. Nakakahiya!
Had a Dream
Luis, 5-ish years old, Chona’s son had a dream. By the way, Chona is a Marketing Officer in BDO SM Dasmarinas.
“Mama, nag-dream ako, may pillow raw ako na CARS (Disney-Pixar’s animated Movie). Nasan na yun?”
“Ha?” Chona replied, “Eh dream lang yun eh…”
“O sige mommy, bili ka na lang mamaya…”
Now that’s what I call “asking for what you want and getting it.”
Bantay Salakay
Tommy is our brave ‘bantay’. Too bad, his braveness caused him his leg, it’ll be forever hanging in the air.
During one choir rehearsal in our house, a choirmate asked me, “Bakit nakataas ang paa ng aso?” I jokingly replied, “Iihi lang yan.”
My choirmate waited and waited, “Antagal naman?”
I simply answered, “Habang buhay na sya iihi.”
