Manhole
Accidents happen and someone could really fall into a manhole…
This happened to Lizza, a former choir mate back in my La Salle Dasma Chorale Days. We just finished rehearsing for our Performing Arts Group Parade (Yes people, we rehearse parades) and we were about to go to the canteen when Lizza suddenly vanished! We then realized that she fell on the manhole beside the canteen.
We pulled her up and asked her if anything was hurting. She simply said, “Dun tayo sa may CR, masakkit ang paa ko,” she fell standing up.
After we went far from the group, I asked her, “Ano masakit?”
She said, “Wala masyado kaya lang nakakahiya talaga.”
Signature
My friends always made fun of my signature. They said it looked like I erased something that I already wrote (you know what I’m saying?)
Khey, a former colleague had to forward a document to the Underwriting Department but was asked why did Orlee sign the document? She said, "Ay! Hindi po. Bura po yan."
A similar incident happend when I was about to forward an important document and was confronted about my signature, "Sure po ba kayo sa pirma n’yo sir?"
Helmet
I finally decided to wear the helmet bought by tatay. I was about to drive out when nanay shouted, “Naks! Ang gwapo ng anak ko.”
I was not sure if I should be proud or angered by the comment. How could I look ‘gwapo’ if people can’t see my face?
Breezily
Three days ago, my parents experienced their hottest summer night. They don’t usually turn on the air conditioner over night, due to the high electric bill, but that night, they did.
My mom slept in comfort for the first time in months.
At exactly 6 am, nanay woke up. She said to herself, “P*** sindi pa rin ang aircon. Magkano kaya babayaran ko sa Meralco?” and tried to get back to sleep. By 6:05 am, she woke up and said to herself, “Magkano kaya babayaran ko sa Meralco?”
She tried to get back to sleep several times during that morning but she wasn’t able to pull off that success story.
She finally rose and had the most terrible headache she had in months.
Another Ping Blog
"Hooo! Kaya naman si Ping ang iboboto mo dahil taga-Cavite s’ya eh," one of the branch staff told me.
"Hindi ah!" I proudly replied.
"Eh bakit s’ya ang iboboto mo?"
"Kasi taga-Imus s’ya."
Happy Mother’s Day
Because it’s a day for moms, we greeted lola Pinang yesterday, "La! Happy mother’s day!"
She just asked, "Ano yun?"
Total Wreck
A client recently had a very serious accident in his motorcycle, his Yamaha Sniper, the Insurance people declared it as total wreck. He then learned that I also had a motorcycle bought from Yamaha Dasmarinas. He told me, “Naku, napakapangit ng service dyan sa Yamaha!” I nodded my head while looking at his broken leg, “nung mag-ke-claim na ako ng motor, kasi dapat replacement tapos ako pa rin magbabayad para bigyan ako ng new unit.”
“Talaga sir?” I asked him.
“Oo tingnan mo pag na-total wreck ka, pangit din service nila.”
<I wanna reply, “Sir excited na nga ako ma-total wreck eh.”>
Grandmother Blonde
Lola picked up my sister’s Barbie Doll. Stared at it and asked, “Ganito ba ang kulay ng buhok ng mga Amerikana?” while pointing at the blonde child’s play.
“Oho,” speaking louder than the usual conversation volume (she badly needs a hearing aid).
Our reply caught our lola quite surprised seemed to have saddened her. While she stared at the doll, we couldn’t help asked, “La, bakit po?”
“Akala ko kasi ganito ang buhok nila,” while pointing to her silver locks.
Campaign Ad
“Si Ping, ang kinabukasan…” Hope for the country, that’s what Ping’s ad was all about. Then came the dirty minds of those pang-masa DJs on the radio: “Siping, may kinabukasan.” Well, it does makes sense.
Stool
During my first ever Medical Examination, I was really nervous. First of all, it was a job requirement. Second, I was alone. Thirdly, I hate jargons, especially medical jargons. After my last routine, I was asked to bring a stool and urine sample. I was shocked! I know what a urine sample is but why in the world would I need to bring a chair to this medical clinic?
I pretended I knew what the nurse said and left. After asking a few friends thru text, I then learned that I just need to bring few duties. Eeew.
Free Operation
I have a lot of friends who just graduated in medicine I happily informed my mom, “Nay, may kakilala ako willing mag opera ng libre.”
Nanay dumbfounded and thought to herself who will, in this day and age, will do a free operation. “Bakit libre?”
“First time n’ya mag-o-opera.”
Eden
I was ecstatic about the Palawan trip! We had a tour guide immediately in the bus from the Puerto Princesa Airport to the Crocodile Farm, “Good morning ladies and gentlemen! I hope you had a great flight today,” very professional, I thought to myself. “Please take care of your garbage because we have a anti-littering rule here in Palawan,” and very responsible citizens. “I will be your guide today and WELCOME TO PUERTO PRINSISA!” Ay sumablay.
That was the start of Eden Fabrigas, the tour guide’s downfall. “On your left, is an Acacia Tree, ginagamit po ‘yan sa pag-gawa ng iba’t ibang furniture. Lamisa, Upuan…” Wow! Very informative. “Yan pong nakikita n’yo, yan tricycle po ‘yan.” Stating the obvious.
“Dito po sa Palawan ang sikat pong pasalubong ay… bibigyan ko po kayo ng Hent…” My eyes brightened up and smile with a grin, I asked Frida, my bus seatmate, “Ano raw? Bibigyan tayo ng manok?” and she jokingly punched me and signaled me to shut up, “…Kasoy.”
Contact Made
Last week, I needed to renew my contact lenses (they’re more than a year old) but the Ian, the girl from Executive Optical Glorietta Branch, said, "Kailangan po di puyat, saka hindi po pwedeng naka-contact lense kayo, dapat po nakasalamin kayo atleast 15 minutes."
Ok, so I just did what Ian said, I slept well and wore my glases all afternoon. I went back to EO this afternoon to finally renew my contact lenses (again), fortunately Ian was there, I stormed to her and said, "Miss, di na ako puyat." She smiled and told the optalmologist, "Ma’am, papagawa na raw si sir ng contact lense, di na raw s’ya puyat." Apparently, she remembered.
Dual Jobs
I had this crazy idea, why are pinoys abroad have a dual job? Some seel call cards while working for an employer? Or do work and do something else over the weekends?
We here in the Philippines can also do that job, right? Ron Darrell, a former college classmate, and I had this idea of working your day job on weekdays and apply for a call center job on weeknights? You’ll then ask me, "When do we sleep?" I’ll tell you when: Weekends! <6 hours of sleep x 5 nights>
Won’t that be alot of cash on your pocket?
