Dubai Why?
Eversince I left the Philippines for over a week now, I’ve asked all of the silliest questions from my friends in Dubai:
- Bakit pa-sideways tumango ang mga Indian?
- Bakit walang ulap sa Dubai?
- Bakit ayaw tumigil ng bus kahit parahin ko?
- Bakit gustung-gusto nila sa damuhan kahit sobrang init?
My favourite question though is this one: WHAT’S THAT AGAIN? Why? You ask me. Because here in Dubai, I’ve noticed that the English is not properly structured. I used to be very conscious about my grammar but here: KANYA KANYANG INGLISHAN NA LANG.
They don’t even bother to construct their sentences correctly and their accent? BAHALA NA!
Even the simple words like: Pikchoor, Cho-ko-leyt and ‘I don’t noww…
By da end of mai is-tey hir in Doobayy, I will be is-peaking in mai own ing-glish bersyons.
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See also Camel, Male Rape, Another OFW
MP3 Download Time
Tatay requested me to download MP3s for his new player. We were searching by artists then by song. I asked him, “Sino pa ‘tay?”
“Bee Gees naman. Words,” he answered.
I clicked ‘Words’ then asked, “Ok, Words, ano pa?”
“Word naman.”
“Ho?” I asked, “Iba ba ang Words sa Word?”
“Yung it’s only words and words are all I have…” he sang.
“Oho,” I answered, “Words ‘yun. Ano yung Word?”
“This word has lost its glory, let’s start a brand new story…” he continued.
“Tay, World ‘yun… Sa Words pa ring kanta.”
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See also Taypod, Lolo’s Birthday, Another OFW
Axe
After watching the Axe Commercials, Nanay can’t help but ask, “Ano ba amoy nyang Axe na yan?”
I then asked, “Bakit ho?”
“Eh kasi parang hayok na hayok ang mga babae ‘pag naaamoy nila eh.”
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See also English for Two Weeks, Surprise Suitcase, Coke Commercial
Camel
Usual comment on my pre-departure built: Orlee, tumataba ka.
My answer: Storing fat for the desert.
Their answer: Ano ka camel?
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See also Male Rape, Let’s Beat Him, There’s No Easy Way…
Fluids
I asked the teacher in ESS-South this morning, “Ma’am, after ko mag-donate ng dugo, pwede ba akong uminom ng alcohol after?”
“Ah, eh, ang alam ko dapat maraming fluids ang inumin n’yo. Oo, sir, pwede siguro.”
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See also Healthy Sisig Please?, Stool
No Difference
I planned to compile my family’s old (really old) pictures to create a picture book. Unfortunately, the shop that creates picture books need soft copies of pictures. I then decided to ask Aileen, my college classmate, to scan my old pictures. She agreed and told me to just drop the pictures on her computer shop.
Before dropping them off, I texted her, “Aileen, h’wag mo pagtatawanan yung mga luma kong pictures ha?”
She replied: “Kahit naman new pictures mo eh nakakatawa! Normal lang yun!”
See also Uninviting you in Advance 2, Motel Dasmarinas, SE4: Toilet Humor
